The breakup of a marriage can be an overwhelmingly stressful event, fraught with uncertainty, upheaval, and loss of control.  Women going through divorce have a unique set of challenges to contend with including financial insecurity, potentially re-entering the job market and juggling the responsibiilties of children and career.   The emotional toll of a divorce can be particularly difficult for women who face the challenge of integrating new and old roles as they stuggle to rebuild their identity.  While getting a divorce is an extremely painful experience, it can also be a time of tremendous personal growth and development.

An important part of the healing process for women invloves learning to honor feelings that may have been dormant such as anger, shame and sadness.  By learning how to cope with the emotions that surface throughout the divorce process, women can begin to feel more in control of their lives. Women who share their pain in a relationship that is understanding, caring, and accepting find that they feel free to express their painful emotions. As they struggle through the healing process, they become more powerful and develop greater internal strength and resilience. Woman who work through the difficult emotions that arise in the divorce process can also learn to overcome feelings of bitterness and resentment toward their husbands and themselves, improve their sense of efficacy and self-esteem, develop tools that foster healthier intimate relationships, and begin to free themselves of the past and move forward with their lives.

Dr. Nicole R. Gerber

The Center for Divorce Recovery